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Post by jexarbell on Nov 15, 2009 1:24:46 GMT -5
you might go away!! It always played out the same, the same dream, the same beginning and the same ending. The same smells, the same pain and the same feelings. Jezarbell knew it was a dream because she was standing off to the side watching herself attacking her step-mother, the evil bitch of a women who hated the pictures of her mother that were sitting on the mantel piece. As she watched she watched herself drag the woman to the floor by the hair and started hitting her, her father was always someone where she couldn't see him until he walked in front of her towards well....her on the floor, the memory.
He carried a broken chair leg in his hand and she watched as he raised it and brought it down on his daughters back and continued the motionm, she could feel the pain of the skin on her back breaking. But yet she could see the blood forming on the back of her shirt, but she wasn't going to stop not yet. As her father continued to hit her Jezarbell fell to her knees the pain ripping through her back, tears well up in her eyes as she watched the blood now steaming down her own back as the memory of her fell off her step-mother onto the floor in pain.
Her shirt was blood soaked and she could taste the blood in her mouth....Jerking awake she hadn't reaslised she had drifted off to sleep whilst sitting in the hallway waiting for who ever she was meant to be waiting for. As she sat there she adjusted the tank top she was wearing and scolded herself for even brining tank tops to wear, as she sat there she had an urge to go swimming. But she hadn't set foot into a swimming pool after what had happened to her back, it wasn't even worth feeling all of the eyes on her looking at the large scars on her back and the ones that seemed to dribble up and down.
No in her mind, nothing was worth that. Raising her knees to her chest she hooked her arms around her legs "I don't want to be here" she whispered to herself, but it was her fault she was there, if she hadn't of tried to kill her friends she wouldn't be sitting here wanting to be somewhere else. words: 395 for: open music: tik tok - kesha
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Post by ELIZABETH MILLER on Nov 23, 2009 3:07:05 GMT -5
She knew this would have happened sooner or later. Being that she had done an entire year as a psychiatry resident and had taken a full course of psychology in college anyway, she pretty much had the qualifications as a therapist. One of the therapist had, had a family emergency and she had been asked to take over her sessions for the day as the other therapists were on time constraints.
She didn't mind if she was going to be here, she might as well talk with the patients. Most of the therapist really didn't care. She would never admit it to another patient but she knew that most of staff didn't really care they were just their work and nothing else. She wasn't like that. She wanted to see people get better. She was a doctor, and no doctor in their right mind wanted to see their patients get worse.
She was now waiting for her next patient. She had already read her file when she had first arrived. She had read everyone's file her first day and pretty much remembered what was in them. However she was rereading the file of Jezarbell Knox at the moment just in case she missed something. She ate some chocolates she had gotten from Switzerland, as she skimmed the file again. Nothing new; the girl was a diagnosed schizophrenic and had already had her first violent outburst which usually didn't happen until the twenties. She also had a psychiatric history in her family and it was a bit ironic that her father was a psychiatrist.
That was one reason she had changed specialties. She didn't want to become numb like a lot of psychiatrist became and they never made the best parents either. Plus there wasn't much actual medicine involved in psychiatry. Still she didn't mind doing this once and a while or taking on a few patients. Liz looked at the clock it was time for her appointment with Jezarbell. She left her desk and went outside her office and into the hallway.
She knew it wasn't easy. Being a therapist was mentally draining and it wasn't a job most people could handle. There was a lot of bad things in the world and most of those things were happening or had happened to the people who had been sent here.
She was now down the hallway and she could spot the young girl. “Jezarbell?” Liz asked looking at her. Hoping she wouldn't wonder where her normal therapists was. She was pretty sure she would but she would just be honest and tell her she had, had a family emergency and she was taking over her sessions until she got back.
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Post by jexarbell on Nov 23, 2009 3:28:29 GMT -5
you might go away!!Jezarbell was lost in her own thoughts, she felt safe sitting where she was. She was comfortable. She didn't know if she could trust anyone really, she didn't talk to people much because they annoyed her to no end. Her and people just didn't seem to get a long because of her issues, of the way her mind worked. And she didn't want people to see her scars on her back.
They were privet, her own little reminder of what had happened to her. She hated them yes, but she lived with him and they always reminded her of what her father had done and what her step-mother had said. Sighing lightly to herself she jerked her head up pulling herself from her thoughts at the sound of her name looking at the woman walking towards her she frowned lightly.
Getting carefully to her feet she continued to frown, she didn't know this woman, but she seemed to know her. "Yes" she said softly, she knew she had to be polite otherwise she might get in trouble. Bitting down on her bottom lip lightly as she walked up to the woman she pulled the back of her tank top down just to make sure her scars were covered.words: 208 for: open music: you belong with me - taylor swift
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Post by ELIZABETH MILLER on Nov 23, 2009 3:53:28 GMT -5
The girl didn't want to be here, but rarely did any of them want to be here. Most people did not want to talk to some person they hardly knew. Or someone that was of authority. That was just the way it was, but she hoped in time the patients would begin to trust her and realize she wasn't here for the money or whatever else they might think.
“Alright then just follow me” She said with a smile, hoping the girl would follow suit. Her office was not far away anyway it was just at the end. She had left her office door open when she had left it go find Jezarbelle. Liz walked in her office and waited for her to come in. Her office was pretty comfortable and laid back. It was kind of different than what one might expect. It wasn't typical. Though it did have a couch, but not the cliché kind. It was a nice leather couch that was soft enough to sleep on. Actually she had slept on it last night because she loved it that much. She also had a poster of Bon Jovi on her wall because it was one her favorite singers. She knew it wasn't the most professional thing but she didn't care. Though she did have art work up on her walls too, most were of Salvador Dali. She absolutely loved his work.
She had a little mini fridge as well and of course a bowl of her swiss chocolates that she would be more than happy to share with, with whoever might want them. She tried to make her office a bit more 'homier'. Especially if she was going to be doing some therapy sessions in it.
She knew she was different than most of the other doctor or therapist here. She had a different approach on things and didn't sugar coat things. It was something some of the staff wanted to hang her for but these weren't children they were dealing with. They seemed to forget that sometimes. They were people who had lost their way and needed to be pushed back on the right path. Some people may have ventured very far from it, over others but she believed it was possible for them to all recover.
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Post by jexarbell on Nov 23, 2009 4:44:47 GMT -5
you might go away!!Following after her without another word Jezarbell ran a hand through her hair shifting it from her face, pausing outside the door she took a deep breath before walking in. Glancing around she continued to bit her bottom lip and walked over to a seat and sat down carefully looking as if she was trying hard to not walk back out of the room.
Infact she was trying to not walk back out of the room, she still hated people. Casting her eyes to the floor she didn't want to look at the woman behind the desk, but after a moment she said her head and looked at her. Pressing her lips together she looked like she wanted to keep quite, all of the doctors in this place had more then likely read her file and knew she had daddy issues.
Rising her left hand to her mouth she bit down on her nail looking scared and nervous, she wasn't good at talking or fitting in. Fiddgiting slightly in the chair she continued to bite her nail as she looked around the room, seeing the posted of Bon Jovi she gave a very small smile. He was alright to listen to.
Looking over the paintings she didn't know who they were by but they were pretty none the less, slowly her eyes wandered back to the woman behind the desk. Taking her hand from her mouth she folded her hands in her lap sitting with her back straight.words: 208 for: open music: you belong with me - taylor swift
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Post by ELIZABETH MILLER on Nov 23, 2009 12:57:11 GMT -5
She was glad that she had followed her and had not try to run off, but she doubted she would have anyway. People usually didn't do things like that, because they knew it would get them in trouble. People usually just followed and came in with a bad attitude. Most people didn't want to have sessions, almost everyone that was in therapy was doing it because someone else was either forcing them or coaxed them into it. Though there were the few that got help themselves and those were usually the easier one's to get through because they had already took the fist step. Admitting you have a problem.
Liz sat at down on the chair that was in the corner that was angled toward the couch. She didn't really want to sit behind the desk, she felt it made her seem less approachable. She looked to the young girl who had already taken a seat and was nervous. It was expected, it was completely normal to be nervous. She remembered whenever she was young she had always been nervous when being confronted by an authority figure. Her nervous habit was playing with her nail beds instead of biting them.
“Would you like some chocolate? They came from Switzerland best chocolate you will ever taste.” She said holding out the bowl for the girl to take some if she wished. She looked to the girl and smiled before speaking up again. “We are going to do something a little different today, we are going to do a little role reversal. So right now you are the doctor and I'm the patient” She said wondering how the girl would react. She wasn't going to cut to the chase right away. No she didn't know this girl yet and she knew she wasn't going to be opening up their very first meeting. It was something that would take time. Plus what she was doing was very different, but she didn't do things by the book. It was limited and she wasn't chained by limitations.
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